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You might worry that you could develop or 'catch' the same illness as your ill parent – but you cannot catch a mental illness from anyone. People might say 'it runs in families' or talk about the genetics or genes causing the illness.
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Read More »Suitability: Children, Young People Category: Information, Videos Type: Video, Web Page Time Required: Minutes You might worry that you could develop or ‘catch’ the same illness as your ill parent – but you cannot catch a mental illness from anyone. People might say ‘it runs in families’ or talk about the genetics or genes causing the illness. First you need to know that apart from one or two extremely rare special illnesses, genes do not decide if we get a mental illness or not. In a particular family, a specific illness or similar illnesses may be found in people of different generations, but that is not caused by the genes alone, it is also because they may be living in similar environments with similar types of stress. Genes can define our basic strengths and weaknesses, but it is what happens in our lives that decides how these genes finally affect us. It’s true that we cannot decide on something like our height, although we may not reach our full height if we do not eat properly, but in terms of the brain and our minds, the genes decide more what we might be good at or find more difficult. This means that even if it is something we could be good at, we might not develop it or waste the skill, and if it’s a weakness, we can learn things to strengthen that weakness. So if you’re worried that you might develop a mental illness because your parent has a mental illness it is important to ask ‘has your life been exactly the same as your parents?’ No, so you’re coming from a totally different starting point. It is true that having a parent with a mental illness is a stressor which could influence or contribute to you developing a mental illness because it’s something which is happening in your early environment and current environment. But it is only one thing among many factors that might contribute to developing a mental illness. You should remember that the chance of not developing a mental illness is much greater than the chance of developing one. This is true even if you have a parent with a mental illness. Also, there are a number of things you can do to help protect yourself from developing a mental illness. One of these is to find out more about mental illness and understand it better.
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Read More »If your friend doesn't respect your feelings, it's an unhealthy relationship. Feeling anxious or negative in your friendship is a sign that it may be best to end it. Your friend is dishonest or holds back information. “Deep connections require trust,” Schmitt says.
After his father died, Paul Marlow, a 36-year-old mental health advocate in Surrey, British Columbia, was at a turning point. “I saw I needed a change,” Marlow says. He wanted to let go of unhealthy habits and start fresh. “I found myself yearning to move away from the old me, the depressed and anxiety-filled me,” he says. But as he tried to move forward, his friends held him back. While Marlow was adopting a healthier lifestyle, his friends prioritized drinking and partying. As Marlow struggled emotionally, his friends reached out less and less, and he realized that it was time to move on. “There can be many reasons that a friendship becomes unhealthy. But any friendship that consistently contributes to our feeling disregarded, devalued, or disrespected should be re-evaluated,” says Gina Handley Schmitt, LMHC, a psychotherapist in the Seattle area and author of Friending: Creating Meaningful, Lasting Adult Friendships.
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